Nowadays, people increasingly expect their emotions to be watched and cared for.
In a relationship, they expect emotional support from their partner;
At work, they expect companies to care about the emotional needs of their employees;
When they are unhappy, they want to seek emotional satisfaction through consumption.
Paying attention to personal feelings and caring for one's inner experience is a positive behavior and a symbol of social progress.
But everything has to be in moderation.
It can be dangerous if the focus on emotions turns into a claim on emotional values.
Claiming emotional value in relationships is an unfortunate beginning.
Emotional value refers to the influence a person has on the emotions of others.
The more a person can bring comfort, pleasure and stability to others, the higher his emotional value.
Emotional value, however, is what others say about themselves, not what they say about others.
Many people misinterpret this. They want others to cater to their emotions, but they are not willing to give.
For example, in a couple, one partner asks the other to pay attention to their emotions at all times, whether it is happy or unhappy, and to get an immediate response.
On the surface, the man was satisfied.
However, there is a saying that "all the gifts of fate have already been secretly priced."
When this person demands emotional value from others, the other person keeps consuming in order to cater to him.
Over time, the other side will always have an intolerable day, will break out, at this time, the relationship of misfortune began.
To demand emotional value from others is not to see them as real people, but as providers of emotions.
And the person himself will become weaker and more dependent on others. Eventually, both sides end up in a situation where they torment each other.
In fact, being an emotionally stable person is the greatest emotional value.
Asking for emotional value from others is essentially the pursuit of a "always have someone to coax you" mentality, but in the end, this will only lead to "there is always a liar for you" ending.
In short, we all crave attention and care for our emotions, but when you demand emotional value from others, you are actually being controlled by others. They are the master of emotions, and seeking emotional value is not as good as pursuing emotional stability.
Comments